At Considerable Cost

Hard to believe this picture was taken 8 years ago! Today was my tenth birthday without Mama.   I've written previously about how Mama made me feel special just for being born.   I wondered if birthdays would ever be special again and there have been a few rough ones over the past ten years.   Today, I decided to remember what I had written about it being a day baptized, so I focused on the celebration of Clare's baptism birthday.   Eight years ago, she was baptized in Christ and today, we celebrated the day as birthday buddies. I spent the morning grocery shopping and preparing our meal.   I needed a crock pot meal since we had a busy evening with mass and a meeting at church.   I tried my stovetop spaghetti and meatballs in the crockpot and it turned out great.   I made some other special foods, like these chocolate-filled raspberries which w...

I happened upon this interview from charming British artist, writer, comedian, Noel Fielding.   In this interview, he discusses turning forty.   It is so true.   It also made me think more about social media, especially Facebook.   Facebook, Instagram, Twitter--even blogging for those whose main purpose is to build an audience-- just seem to encourage/tempt a perpetual state of being in one's thirties, as they are described below.  I wonder if social media may alter normal stages of human development?   There's a thesis for someone.   "In your twenties, you're trying to work out who you are.   In your thirties, you're trying to tell everyone who you are and then, your forties, you don't care."     It was almost automatic the day I turned 40 last year .   I still care deeply about people, but I just don't worry so much what they think ...

 About a year and a half ago, our then next-door-neighbor showed up on my doorstep with a huge bag in her hands.  "Could you use this?   I'm just going to throw it away if you don't want it."   A big bag of free?   Always.   "Sure," I said.   Then, I stuffed it in the closet, without looking at its contents, just knowing it was pirate stuff left over from a birthday party.   Every time it was in my way, I considered, for the briefest of moments, throwing the whole lot out.   But then I remembered it was free and I shoved it aside as I looked for the latest lost item.   Last fall, Netflix added Disney's Jake and the Neverland Pirates  to their line-up and Thomas was an instant fan.   At Halloween, he wanted to be Jake, specifically.   I nudged him toward a cheaper costume so he was a pirate, generally.            F...

Thomas Becket, born December 31, 2008, 10:59 a.m., 8 lbs. 9 oz. On the seventh day of Christmas... For Thomas's second birthday, I wrote a bit about the day he was born and included some of his baby pictures: http://loaves-and-fishes.blogspot.com/2010/12/officially-toddler.html Today, my baby, my little boy, turns five years old and while I am thankful for his healthy growth, I am not taking it extremely well that my baby is five and will start school next year.   Thomas is such a sweet boy, always ready with a kiss and hug.   He tears around the house, wearing his Thomas the Tank Engine blanket as a cape, as he pretends to be Superman, Thor, or some other super hero.   He loves watching Gator Boys and pretending to wrestle his stuffed alligators.   He is spoiled by his two big sisters and maybe a bit by his mama.   He would eat candy and snack foods all day if we let him, but he also likes to eat ham and eggs, althou...

      Most of my childhood pictures have me with a baby doll December 1st was the official anniversary of the day when prayers were answered and a dream came true.   My first-born, my Emmeline, is ten years old and I have been a mother for a decade. In January of 2003, I was a fourth grade teacher in my ninth year of teaching.   I was a wife of six years.   During those six years, we faced my diagnosis with ulcerative colitis and its active condition, my spinal surgery, moving to a new state for graduate school, Joey's time in graduate school, my conversion and re-reversion(?) to the Catholic Church, and infertility.   We were still renters, living in our second apartment, and we didn't feel shame in that, even if the Home and Garden TV channel seemed to say otherwise.    By spring of that year, I was at a place of such peace when my friend, Regina, visited with her two daughters....